Still There? Still Counting?

Anyone there?  ::taps on glass::

Helllllllooooooo?  :: presses face against the glass & starts to breathe heavy to fog it up and entertain myself::

I'm seriously beginning to think that I'm just here talking to myself.  Outside of the occasional spam, comments are few & far between.  Sorry I can't share more exciting news to keep you interesting.  Believe me, I wish I could.

Well, in case you're actually still here and you are still counting, last weekend was EIGHT (8) MONTHS into our wait.  We have now reached the point that we will require an update to our homestudy since it expires at one year.  It will have to be reviewed, completed, and re-approved.  We'll see if the dogs behave again this time.  Promise to keep you posted!

35 Weeks

REWIND: Friday, August 24, 2012

NOTE:  This is NOT a photo of my bump, but it is a pic of the bump for my baby.  :)
We hope to meet our (potential) future birthmother next week. 

How your baby's growing:

Your baby doesn't have much room to maneuver now that he's over 18 inches long and tips the scales at 5 1/4 pounds (pick up a honeydew melon). Because it's so snug in your womb, he isn't likely to be doing somersaults anymore, but the number of times he kicks should remain about the same. His kidneys are fully developed now, and his liver can process some waste products. Most of his basic physical development is now complete — he'll spend the next few weeks putting on weight.

Speechless

Rewind --- Wednesday, August 22, 2012, 2:47pm

THE CALL came today.  8 months and 5 days officially waiting and we are matched.

We are going to be parents . . . in only a handful of weeks.  This is amazing.

It's Not IF Calling . . . This Time

Nope.  It wasn't IF.  Instead, it's the waiting-future-adoptive-Mommy-and-presently-crazy-lady!  Mr. Rambler and I went to South Lake Tahoe for a weekend getaway and family wedding.  After we landed at the airport, we descended down a long & steep escalator towards baggage claim.  As we were coming down the escalator I saw a stroller/infant carrier like we plan to get at the bottom. Then (here comes the delusional me!) I thought to myself, “How cool would that be if A (the co-owner/director of our agency) was standing there with OUR baby in OUR carrier???”

Told ya so . . . . . I am now the waiting-future-adoptive-Mommy-and-presently-crazy-lady.  This can only get worse the longer we wait!

The (Non-) Nursery

I've been planning to write some fancy, well-worded blog post about our nursery but I'm unable to find the words.  Imagine that . . . The Rambler has no words.  However, I have no nursery either.

I'm not able to go in there and get anything started.  I just can't.  Lately, I've felt kind of hopeless about "that room."  For YEARS (longer than the 5.5 years we've been married), I have envisioned that room as our baby's nursery.  From the day I moved in this house until that dreaded day I had to let my kitty go, that was Mindy's room.  It's been my scrapbooking & craft room, but I haven't had the motivation to do that.  I can only scrapbook so much of Mr. & Mrs. Rambler, our family and our pets.  All I want to sew is baby stuff, but I'm scared to do that.

I asked DH if we could move his office in with mine & use his office for a nursery instead.  I like the layout of his office much better, but he doesn't want to excavate all his millions of piles of shit and other random crap do that.  So, for now, the room that should become a nursery for our imaginary baby is just a shithole full of stuff, a storage center, a place to dump things.  And I have a feeling it's going to stay that way for a while.  Well, at least until I have a true reason to do anything with it.

Ugly Blog

I hate the look of this blog.  What crackhead did this design?  Oh yeah . . . me.  Well, I hate it.  Guess I probably need to find someone to do a redesign (that isn't ugly) for me.

Nothing else to report.  Still waiting for baby.  hmph

Cleaning Up

Unfortunately, I have NOT been cleaning up the bedroom that will hopefully, someday become the nursery for our imaginary baby. However, I did clean up my blog roll. I literally linked to every.single.blog that was listed. Anything that was private, closed, or not updated in the year 2012 A.D. is gone. If you have a blog that you want me to add, let me know. Hope that helps some of you who stalk creep use this blog as a resource.

 And, no, we have not heard anything from the agency. You know you wanted to ask!

(ps - That pic above is not of me cleaning.  I don't look that thin in genie earrings & Hammer pants.)

Look Up

Seriously.  Look up towards the blog header.  See that ticker?  It says SEVEN MONTHS.  Anybody have the ability to fast forward time? I'm starting to get (continuing to get?) discouraged.  I know our baby is out there.  I know God has a plan for us.  I know this is not a long wait compared to so many, but still . . .

During IF treatments, every month came with hope and disappointment.  There would be a chunk of time where you hoped this would be "it" and a day of huge disappointment followed by days of barren feelings before hope popped up again.  It's kind of the same but different now, and I still have those feelings probably more often than before.  Every day I walk by a room that longs to be a nursery. Every day I think of cleaning out that room but can't because of fear. Every day I look at my pups and think of what great fursiblings they'll be.  Every day I look at Mr. Rambler and long for him to be a father.  Every day my heart wishes to be a mother.  Every day we hope the phone will ring with THE Call. And every day we wait.

10 Things to Never Say to Your Childless Friends

A friend of mine shared the article linked below on FB.  It's a great article to remember and share with others.  Whether a friend is childless by choice or by "force" they don't need to be questioned, reassured, or bullied about it.  Although most people have good intentions, questions aren't always taken that way by those of us on the receiving end.  Thanks for the article, Anna Banana Bread.  I know you're always checking up on us here and cheering us along the way!  :)

Be sure to click the link for the full article.  I've only shared their list.

From Glo:  10 Things Never to Say to Your Childless Friends

1.  So when are you guys going to get started? 
2. You'll understand when you're a mom. 
3. Just relax.  You'll get pregnant in no time. 
4. It must be nice to have time to read a book/go to the movies/have a romantic dinner. 
5. I didn't invite you because there will be kids at the party. 
6. Have you tried different sex positions/diets/doctors/wearing looser underwear? 
7. Is your husband OK with you not wanting kids? 
8. Your dog is your baby. 
9. You'll change your mind about having kids in a few years. 
10. Since you don't have kids, you can afford a new car/remodeling project/vacation.


And since this is MY blog, I'm adding one more:


11.  Have you heard anything about a baby?  Dude . . . you'll know when we do!!!!!

In Case You're Counting

6 1/2 months . . . . . . .
hoping we're at LEAST half way there . . . . . . . . .