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Sunday, April 19, 2009

Don't Have a Title for This

I don't even know what to say. I don't even have much to say. Another cycle - gone. BFN. Spotting. AF will be here tomorrow. No 2009 baby. Going at this for over 2 years now, 3 calendar years. Ovulating normally. Everything is normal. Can't get pg. We probably aren't even doing it right anymore. Don't want another surgery. Can't afford ART. Sick of temping. Didn't even temp this morning. Tired. Really, really tired. Wondering if this life we already have will be enough without children. Maybe it is. Maybe God has other plans for us. Don't know how much longer I can do this. Not necessarily sad or depressed. Just tired. Almost done. Thank God for wine.

9 comments:

kate said...

I have no word of comfort other than to say I'm here for you and I am keeping you in my thoughts. ((hugs))

PinkChic said...

I do know how you feel. I wonder if this IVF doesn't work, what we will do. It feels like we are hampsters on a wheel with no purpose right now. I am sorry that you feel spent. Wish I had that magic word to pick you up and dust you off. Just don't give up...never give up!

Marsha said...

I know nothing I could say would make any of this any easier for you, so just want to tell you that I love you and I'm praying for you.

Susan K said...

I'm so sorry. One question: have you looked into mind/body stuff or energy work (i.e. Chinese medicine like acupuncture)? I know these things cost money, but I'm sold on their ability to help the relaxation and receptiveness factor. I've been reading the book "Fully Fertile" and gaining a lot of insight. It helps me not feel so broken. Just a thought.

WiseGuy said...

Super Sad at this.... maybe you should take a break for about two cycles and then cool-head the future course of action.

While the world is bursting at its seams with population...some of us, are still scratching our ankles to at least get started.

Shannon said...

Im so sorry (((hugs)))

Meg said...

:( so sorry my friend.

Maria (MKC101103) said...

Sending you hugs hugs hugs and more hugs. Sorry I'm so late, but it's never too late for a hug :)

Maria (MKC101103) said...

One more thing after reading what Susan K wrote...

My only successful pregnancy came the month after I did Reiki. Just sayin.

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