Not that I was really holding out a lot of hope for a BFP this cycle . . . but I was holding out hope. My cruel body was giving me all sorts of phantom pg symptoms -- killer boobs, falling asleep on the couch right after work, slight twinges of nausea, heartburn, good temps, pretty implantation dip, cramping, and more.
This morning my temped dropped. It's still above coverline, but we all know the drill. Slight spotting, but I usually spot anywhere from 2-4 days before that wicked, red-headed slut darkens my door.
Obviously, trying to sell or trade-in this body won't get me anywhere. Therefore, this body's going to the junkyard. Just throw it in the city dump. Instead, I'm going to upgrade to a young, thin, fertile, body with long hair and clear skin.
Luckily tonight we have plans with friends. I shall drink a crapload of beer, eat some nitrate-filled bratwurst, hang out in our friends' hot tub until I look pickled, quit my job, apply for welfare, and maybe take a couple of hits of heroin for good measure. Now THAT will get me pregnant!!!