Adding to the Team

BEWARE:  There's a lot to share and read here.

Yesterday, DH and I arrived separately at the office of a nationally-renowned IVF clinic.  As I entered the somewhat dimly-lit waiting room, I was happy to see Mr. Rambler there already, filling out paperwork.  Feeling relieved to not only have seen my husband after a long day, but to see him filling out paperwork for the first time in this journey, instantly put me at ease.  We read, initialed, signed, dated (rinse, lather, repeat) chatted, and watched CNN until our turn came.

The portal to the place where the magic happens opened to a tall, dark man with a large smile.  Enter "Dr. Super", the newest member of Team Rambler!  We began to review through my medical history and records, and not soon after Dr. Super took off his glasses and asked me about my experience with Dr. Gloom & Doom.  Yet again (for the millionth time), my gut was proven correct again as Dr. Super began to ask me some clarifying questions. 

Dr. Super asked me some questions and did so in a very delicate, yet inquisitive, manner.

• Did I have a bicornuate uterus?  (no)
• Did I have fibroids? (don't think so)
• What exactly did that doctor do? (other than misdiagnose me, SHC, HSG, MRI, Hystero)
• Why didn't he give you a complete diagnosis?  (because he's a dumbass)
• Why did the surgical records look like he abruptly stopped my surgery?  (because he did)

He basically had to find out from ME (the patient) what the hell this dude did and meant in his records. Dr. G&D's records weren't even clear!

I REALLY liked Dr. Super, who is the Medical Director for this area.  He knows his stuff.  I recently heard him speak on IF and IVF and was impressed, but I liked him even more meeting him in person.  Better yet, DH really liked him for many of the same reasons I do.  "Dr. Super" is informative, thorough, honest, forthright, and cuts to the chase.  An infertility specialist with a bit of personality?  Say it isn't so!

After clarifying what had already been jacked up in my body and trying to figure out what was still jacked up with my body, we made a plan.  Yes, a PLAN.

Enter Plan #48265397106.457B1a, Section MCMXIV.  Plan details are very basic to start and will occur in a little over a week.

Plan Part 1: More bloodwork. 
This vampiring session will only be done to test my AMH.  When I asked Dr. S if there was anything else he wanted to test, his response was basically that I'd had every other test done that was necessary thanks to Dr. Terrific.  Good thing all of that blood that's been drained from my body was helpful in some way.
Plan Part 2: Office Hysteroscopy
Dr. S wants to see if there are any signs indicative of the uterine cavity being an unfavorable environment for baby growing.  He'll primarily be looking for fibroids since Dr. G&D's records were so unclear that questions are left in Dr. Super's mind.  Basically, another new man for another new hoo-ha party.
Plan Part 3: Meet with Office Manager
Time to talk money.  That's the scary part.  It's all fun and games until we have to start paying out more cash.

Everything else is dependent upon what the hysteroscopy and AMH show.  If the hystero shows fibroids, I'll need to head back into the OR.  Dr. Terrific would do that surgery because Dr. Super does not do surgery.  He simply makes babies.  Fine with me.  If my AMH is low, then Dr. S does not feel confident about IVF using my eggs.  We'll look at the data that we're given, and decide if my eggs would even work to perform IVF.  Either way, he strongly suggests that we undergo genetic testing (specifically a very extensive testing for all 23 chromosomes) for every single embryo extracted if we do IVF.  Dr. Super is of the opinion that if my AMH is good that we need to make sure that any potential miscarriages happen in the dish - not after transfer.  Again, fine with me.

So, we either do IVF with my eggs, do IVF with donor eggs, don't do IVF, don't have children at all, or adopt.  DH and I will carefully and thoughtfull cross each bridge as we come to it.  There are so many factors to consider - age, time, physical resources, financial resources, and especially emotional resources.  We BOTH need to be comfortable with whatever we decide to do.  Dr. Super is giving us a plan to start with, and depending on what we learn, we may continue with him or get additional opinions.

Bottom line is that we want a family.  We will have children, but we aren't sure exactly how this is going to happen.  This is where we have to insure our emotional resources and tread lightly before making decisions.

I have always strived to be completely open and honest in this blog.  I do admit, however, that as we continue on it makes me nervous to share too much information.  I want our lives to continue to be OUR lives and only ours.  Things we do or say or think or feel may be contrary to the opinions of others. And honestly, I could give a shit what other people think.  Everyone is entitled to their opinions in life, but unsolicited opinions or negativity from others will either make me take the blog private or end it altogether.  I really would prefer to do neither of those and continue on the course I have been on for a while now.  Just please know that this story is OURS, and while I want to share it to help others in the same situation, this story will remain ours and be shared as we see fit.  And I have spoken.